constellationsammy

Anonymous asked:

I saw this ask from yesterday and you were freaking out about neutron stars, so like what are they and what's your deal with them?

ben-c answered:

OH MY GOD

OHHHHHH MY GODDDDD HERE WE GO HERE WE FUCKIN GO FASTEN YOUR MOTHER FUCKING SEATBELTS BECAUSE I AM GONNA BLOW UR FUCKIN MIND

OK FIRST I DON’T KNOW HOW MANY OF YOU KNOW WHAT A NEUTRON STAR ACTUALLY IS SO LEMME INFORM U. BASICALLY WHEN A STAR DIES SOMETIMES IT GOES SUPERNOVA SO ESSENTIALLY IT EXPLODES AND THEN IMPLODES,  AND DEPENDING ON THE TYPE OF STAR, SOMETIMES IT JUST……….KEEPS IMPLODING. LIKE. MOTHERFUCKER JUST GETS SMALLER AND SMALLER AND DENSER AND DENSER UNTIL IT’S WHAT’S CALLED DEGENERATE MATTER, WHICH IS WHAT A NEUTRON STAR IS MADE OF. AND SERIOUSLY LIKE. THIS SHIT IS SO INCOMPREHENSIBLY DENSE HOLY ASSLAMP. HOLY DANG. TO PUT THIS IN PERSPECTIVE, IF YOU HAD A ONE CENTIMETRE SQUARE CUBE OF THIS SHIT, IT WOULD WEIGHT EIGHT BILLION TONNES. LIKE. THE EQUIVALENT OF LIKE 100 AIRCRAFT CARRIERS. AND THAT’S JUST A TINY LITTLE ONE CENTIMETER FUCKIN CUBE. NEUTRON STARS ARE HUGE IN COMPARISON TO THAT BUT SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO TINY IN COMPARISON TO ACTUAL STARS, LIKE, THEY GET COMPRESSED SO MUCH UNTIL THEY’RE ONLY A FEW MILES ACROSS. SO IT’S LIKE THIS HUGE MOTHERFUCKER BIGGER THAN THE SUN JUST GOT TURNED INTO THE CITY OF MANHATTEN, WITH THE SAME DENSITY IT HAD BEFORE. OH AND DID I MENTION IT’S SPINNING AT 97 MILLION MILES AN HOUR? MOTHER FUCKER.  AND IT’S NOT JUST THE SPINNING THAT’S EXCITING HOLY SHIT OH BOY HOWDY NO. YOU EXPECT THAT WHEN SOMETHING IS SPINNING, IT’S GONNA SLOW DOWN EVENTUALLY, RIGHT? FRICTION AND RELEASE OF ENERGY THROUGH RADIATION AND ALL, YEA. OK. SO USUALLY, NEUTRON STARS DO SLOW THEIR SPINNING, REAL FUCKIN SLOW. LIKE, SO FUCKING SLOW WHAT THE FUCK ARE THEY EVEN DOING. THEY SLOW DOWN BY ABOUT 300THS OF A SECOND EVERY TEN MILLION YEARS. LIKE ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS? WHAT DO YOU EVEN DO FOR TEN MILLION YEARS? FUCK OFF. ANYWAY. THEY DON’T JUST SLOW DOWN. SOMETIMES THERE’S THIS RAD AS FUCK THING CALLED A STARQUAKE THAT HAPPENS ON THE SURFACE OF THEM (A SURFACE WHICH, BY THE WAY, HAS A CRUST 10 MILLION TIMES STRONGER THAN STEEL), AND IT CREATES CRACKS, SO THE WHOLE FUCKING STAR HAS TO READJUST ITSELF, AND IT FUCKING SPEEDS UP. AND SOMETIMES IT DOESN’T EVEN NEED A STARQUAKE TO SPEED UP, IT JUST STEALS MASS FROM ADJACENT STARS TO MAKE ITSELF SPIN FASTER. LIKE WHAT THE FUCK. WHY IS THAT EVEN NECESSARY. WHO CARES. FUCK YOU, I’M A NEUTRON STAR.

AND THE NEUTRON STARS THEMSELVES ARENT EVEN WHAT IM EXCITED ABOUT, NOT THAT THOSE IN THEMSELVES ARENT RAD AS FUCK. NO. NEUTRON STARS ARE FUCKING SICK. BUT EVEN SICKER IS THAT THEY CAN TURN INTO PULSARS IF THEIR MAGNETIC FIELDS ARE RIGHT. OH, WHATS A PULSAR YOU ASK? ONLY THE GNARLIEST FUCKING THING IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE MOTHER FUCKER. IM NOT EVEN KIDDING THEYRE SO FUCKING MARVELOUSLY INCREDIBLE IM SO PASSIONATE ABOUT PULSARS MAN. THEYRE BASICALLY NEUTRON STARS WHOSE MAGNETIC FIELDS ARE ALIGNED SO THAT THEY GIVE OFF A BEAM OF LIGHT THAT’S BRIGHTER THAN A BILLION FUCKING SUNS THAT’S NOT AN EXAGGERATION OR A FIGURE OF SPEECH NO THAT’S FUCKING LITERAL FACT. FROM EACH MAGNETIC POLE THERE’S JUST. FUCKING LIGHT. BRIGHTER THAN ANYTHING. HARDCORE RADIATION. AND BECAUSE IT’S SPINNING SO FAST, THE TWO BEAMS OF LIGHT MAKE IT LOOK LIKE IT’S FLASHING. MAYBE YOU’VE HEARD OF THE LGM FROM 1967. MAYBE NOT. BUT THAT SHIT WAS THE FIRST TIME WE IDENTIFIED A PULSAR AND IT CONFUSED THE FUCK OUT OF A LOT OF PEOPLE WHO WERE P CONVINCED THAT ALIENS WERE TRYING TO TALK TO US. WHICH WASN’T TOO MUCH OF A STRETCH GIVEN THAT THEY LITERALLY JUST PICKED UP A SIGNAL OF SOMETHING RANDOMLY FLASHING EVERY 1.3 SECONDS WITH NO EXPLANATION. THEY WERE SO CONVINCED IT WAS ALIENS THAT THEY CALLED THE SIGNAL LGM WHICH STOOD FOR LITTLE GREEN MEN WHICH IS FUCKING HILARIOUS IF YOU ASK ME. BUT NO. MOTHERFUCKING PULSAR. FLASHING AWAY LIKE IT’S NOBODY’S BUSINESS. GOIN 97 MILLION MILES AN HOUR AND BLINKIN FOR NO FUCKIN REASON LIKE AN ASSHOLE, CONFUSING THE SHIT OUT OF SCIENTISTS FOR LIKE A YEAR. WHAT A CHAMP. GODDAMN. AND IT’S NOT LIKE THAT’S THE ONLY ONE NEAR US. THERE ARE DOZENS WITHIN VIEW OF OUR SHITTY LITTLE PLANET AND EVERY SINGLE PULSAR IN THE UNIVERSE FLASHES AT A SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT RATE. IN FACT, THAT’S HOW WE DETERMINE OUR POSITION IN THE UNIVERSE – PULSAR MAPPING. WHEN WE SENT OUT THE VOYAGER WE INCLUDED A PULSAR MAP SO IF ALIENS FOUND IT THEY COULD COME VISIT US. AS IF ALIENS CAN READ HUMAN NUMBERS TO DETERMINE HOW MANY SECONDS BETWEEN EACH PULSAR’S FLASHES, RIGHT? FUCKING SCIENTISTS DON’T THINK THINGS THROUGH VERY WELL. THIS IS WHY ALIENS DON’T VISIT US. FUCK SCIENTISTS, MAN.

superbecka
thorki-hiddlesworth:

soulforsam:

spideeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey:

nanananabatpig:

I don’t care how many times I reblog this
he is practically naked

It doesn’t even matter who she’s talking about, either, because Sam is only wearing two layers and Cas’ coats are gone
They’re practically nude

 #i can’t stop laughing at sam’s face #he looks like he’s having to work himself up to taking off the plaid layer #”YOU CAN DO IT SAM. YOU DON’T NEED IT. YOU DON’T NEED IT. JUST PULL THE SLEEVE. COME ON.”

Whoa whoa WHOA guys.  Come on now.  Tag your NSFW porn here and warn a girl.  My parents could have been standing behind me or something.

thorki-hiddlesworth:

soulforsam:

spideeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey:

nanananabatpig:

I don’t care how many times I reblog this

he is practically naked

It doesn’t even matter who she’s talking about, either, because Sam is only wearing two layers and Cas’ coats are gone

They’re practically nude

 

Whoa whoa WHOA guys.  Come on now.  Tag your NSFW porn here and warn a girl.  My parents could have been standing behind me or something.

deansbigblackeyes

hod-the-blind:

dx11:

mancermechro:

not sure why people don’t automatically say “shapeshifting” when asked what they want their superpower to be. you could become anyone you want. even fictional characters. anyone. cosplay would always be spot-on. dysphoria wouldn’t exist. perfection

rob a bank and disguise yourself as a stray pen lying on a shelf when the cops come

A pen with a shit ton of money lying next to it.